I didn't know there was friction in Michael's marriage until crisis phone calls were going back and forth between Lisa Marie and Mother, Janet and Rebbie. I wasn't privy to those heart to hearts but it was obvious that the intensity of the romance at the start was mirrored in its falling apart.
The compromise needed in a marriage was, I think, a more difficult shift for Michael to make than he'd imagined. I'd honestly thought this one was going to last because they seemed suited, but when there was a problem, one of them needed to bend first and neither partner knew how to do that. Michael struggled with the demands of married life, and I think Lisa Marie struggled with his isolating creative
process. I'm guessing now, but when you think how she grew up with a father who was always away, always performing, always in the studio, the last thing she needed was an absent husband. She couldn't understand why he had to be gone all the time, and he couldn't understand why she had a problem with him being in the studio, sometimes sleeping there. So, when Lisa Marie questioned his decisions, he thought, wrongly, that she wanted to tie him down.
They spent most of their time living at Lisa Marie's house in Hidden Hills, north of LA, but there was added pressure because Michael had taken under his wing the grandkids of our uncle Lawrence, Joseph's brother. There were problems in that family and my brother had stepped in, feeling that the kids needed real love at a difficult time. I'm sure Lisa Marie had every sympathy but she understandably wanted her husband to be emotionally there for her, too.
As the weeks went by, she realized she was not spending enough family time with her own kids, even though they spent some weekends at Neverland, which still remained a place where visiting families came together. At times, and no doubt in response, Lisa Marie disappeared for a few days and when she wasn't around, Michael became insecure. A vicious cycle developed: she wondered where he was and he wondered where she was - jealousy and distance never were a good combination in Hollywood. Now, instead of coming together, they were pulling apart.
On one occasion, Michael spent the day in the studio with his protege Wade Robson, working late into the night. He decided to stay at Wade's family home at the invitation of his mother instead of of returning to his wife - it was easier that way. Michael hated arguments or raised voices and preferred to avoid a problem rather than confront it. But Lisa Marie wasn't putting up with it: she stood up to Michael and challenged him. That was what he needed, even if he didn't appreciate it. Also, he was still contending with the remnants of his demerol dependency. I don't know how much of it Lisa Marie saw, but I do know that Michael wasn't finding his recovery easy and he was still suffering pain that
agitated him and kept him awake at night.
Another uncomfortable factor for Michael was Lisa Marie's beliefs as a Scientologist. She gave him lots of reading material about her religion and he devoured it all. At some point he discovered that Scientologists don't necessarily rely on medication to treat a child's sickness. Michael's first port of call would be a paediatrician and he worried about what that might mean when they had children. As it was, he didn't have to concern himself for long. The one big factor that tipped things over the edge when it came to Lisa Marie - in Michael's eyes - reneged on her problem to give him kids. As soon as they got married, he started his countdown to having his nine little Moonwalkers. When he became convinced she had broken a pact he felt they made, it would have taken him back to that time when Joseph promised him dinner with Fred Astaire and never delivered. I'm pretty sure Lisa Marie would have felt, from that moment on, as if she was living in Siberia because he would have shut down and gone into retreat.
Soon enough, Lisa Marie ran out of patience. Eighteen months after their wedding, she filed for divorce.
The saddest thing about this whole breakdown is that there was genuine love and friendship between them, but all that got eclipsed and scarred within some power struggle. At the end of the day, it came down to two people with different temperaments and different outlooks, but I always wished for a compromise that never happened.
In the months that followed, I know that she reached out to Janet, Rebbie and Mother for their advice on how to best get through to Michael, to see if there was any way back. For me, that illustrated the love she had for him. But when my brother built those walls, he built them high.
OMG..ASTIA S-AU APUCAT PE FB SA O CRITICE, RFERITOR LA MODUL CUM A SLABIT...CA ARE PICIOARELE SUBTIRI...CA POATE IA DROGURI, CA NU A FACUT SPORT, DOAR S-A INFOMETAT...PTR CA NU SE VEDE MASA MUSCULARA:))
The compromise needed in a marriage was, I think, a more difficult shift for Michael to make than he'd imagined. I'd honestly thought this one was going to last because they seemed suited, but when there was a problem, one of them needed to bend first and neither partner knew how to do that. Michael struggled with the demands of married life, and I think Lisa Marie struggled with his isolating creative
process. I'm guessing now, but when you think how she grew up with a father who was always away, always performing, always in the studio, the last thing she needed was an absent husband. She couldn't understand why he had to be gone all the time, and he couldn't understand why she had a problem with him being in the studio, sometimes sleeping there. So, when Lisa Marie questioned his decisions, he thought, wrongly, that she wanted to tie him down.
They spent most of their time living at Lisa Marie's house in Hidden Hills, north of LA, but there was added pressure because Michael had taken under his wing the grandkids of our uncle Lawrence, Joseph's brother. There were problems in that family and my brother had stepped in, feeling that the kids needed real love at a difficult time. I'm sure Lisa Marie had every sympathy but she understandably wanted her husband to be emotionally there for her, too.
As the weeks went by, she realized she was not spending enough family time with her own kids, even though they spent some weekends at Neverland, which still remained a place where visiting families came together. At times, and no doubt in response, Lisa Marie disappeared for a few days and when she wasn't around, Michael became insecure. A vicious cycle developed: she wondered where he was and he wondered where she was - jealousy and distance never were a good combination in Hollywood. Now, instead of coming together, they were pulling apart.
On one occasion, Michael spent the day in the studio with his protege Wade Robson, working late into the night. He decided to stay at Wade's family home at the invitation of his mother instead of of returning to his wife - it was easier that way. Michael hated arguments or raised voices and preferred to avoid a problem rather than confront it. But Lisa Marie wasn't putting up with it: she stood up to Michael and challenged him. That was what he needed, even if he didn't appreciate it. Also, he was still contending with the remnants of his demerol dependency. I don't know how much of it Lisa Marie saw, but I do know that Michael wasn't finding his recovery easy and he was still suffering pain that
agitated him and kept him awake at night.
Another uncomfortable factor for Michael was Lisa Marie's beliefs as a Scientologist. She gave him lots of reading material about her religion and he devoured it all. At some point he discovered that Scientologists don't necessarily rely on medication to treat a child's sickness. Michael's first port of call would be a paediatrician and he worried about what that might mean when they had children. As it was, he didn't have to concern himself for long. The one big factor that tipped things over the edge when it came to Lisa Marie - in Michael's eyes - reneged on her problem to give him kids. As soon as they got married, he started his countdown to having his nine little Moonwalkers. When he became convinced she had broken a pact he felt they made, it would have taken him back to that time when Joseph promised him dinner with Fred Astaire and never delivered. I'm pretty sure Lisa Marie would have felt, from that moment on, as if she was living in Siberia because he would have shut down and gone into retreat.
Soon enough, Lisa Marie ran out of patience. Eighteen months after their wedding, she filed for divorce.
The saddest thing about this whole breakdown is that there was genuine love and friendship between them, but all that got eclipsed and scarred within some power struggle. At the end of the day, it came down to two people with different temperaments and different outlooks, but I always wished for a compromise that never happened.
In the months that followed, I know that she reached out to Janet, Rebbie and Mother for their advice on how to best get through to Michael, to see if there was any way back. For me, that illustrated the love she had for him. But when my brother built those walls, he built them high.
7 comments:
ASTA E DIN CARTEA LUI jERM
VAD CA INCA MAI ASTEPTAM CARTI
The only book I want to read is Frank Cascio book. Since they were closest to Michael than his own family. And I do believe they will be exposing some people. And who knows maybe LM? I do know that someone had asked Frank on his wall will he talk about the people who acted like that they were there for Mike after his death and really wasnt when he was alive and he said yes! Looking forward to that, hopefully they would mention Cow! Also the bodyguards said something very similar to that aswell. Im interested in that book too because they will speak more on his relationship he had with woman in his last years
DAR MI SE PARE CHIAR PWENIBIL SA VB jERMAINE DESPRE Mariaj
a puctat unele chestii destul de bine, el se inchidea in carapace, el il provoca si nu ajungea la el, faptul ca ea a incalcat promisiunea de a face copii, a puctat si faptul ca se iubeau si ca erau prieteni pana la un punct, il cred pt ca si Tito a zis ca ei doi se iubeau
´´ea il provoca´´, ´´punctat´´ :)
ea are caracterul lui Elvis...e rea, cred, cand e neglijata...plus crescuta cu fitele de rigoare
ea are caracterul lui Elvis...e rea, cred, cand e neglijata...plus crescuta cu fitele de rigoare
da, sunt fitosi, insa ma gandesc ca acesti copii vedete nu au parte de asa multa atentie din partea parintilor si asta dauneaza, plus conditia de copil vedeta si multi alti factori
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